We Need to Talk About Oscar

Jayna Rohslau, ‘19

March 2019

A Very Detailed Analysis of Everything Wrong with the Academy Awards

Every year, the Academy Awards comes around in late February. The Awards, or more commonly called the Oscars, are supposedly held to commemorate the greatest movies and acting. Moreover, all is not innocent as it would seem. And I am not just talking about the recent controversies or issues; this is something deeper, which pervades the institution of the Academy itself. Truly a serious matter on our hands.

First of all, let us look at the statistics, shall we? Approximately 29.6 million people tuned in to watch the Oscars on February 24th, 2019. Millions of people tune in to watch stars male and female, receive gold plated statuettes that vaguely resemble little men. Do you see the terrible problem at hand?  The statuettes, with their strong jawlines and defined ab-muscles, would appear to be most decidedly male from what is visible. Yet in a clear disturbance of equality, women are not presented with statuettes of women. Adding on to this, there is only one body type for Oscar statuettes which obviously presents unhealthy messages about body positivity: think of all the impressionable young boys out of the 29.6 million, crying because they can’t have the golden physique of an Oscars statuette.

Additionally, the nickname of ‘Oscar’ is also a terrible influence for today’s youth. Who is Oscar?  Why does he deserve to have a prestigious film award named after him, when there have been so many deserving females? According to Wikipedia, Oscar was the name of a king of Sweden. His wife was named Josephine of Leuchtenberg, and she was a princess of Bologna who was particularly active in enacting liberal laws (unlike Oscar, whom I can only presume was a Republican). Yet notice that there is not Josephine of Leuchtenberg award or Josie; there is only an Oscar, which shares the name of poor Josie’s husband with his horrible looking black goatee.

Take it all in. Of course there are other Oscar’s controversies in the public eye, to be sure.  Some are even about the movies themselves. But never mind those.

Never mind the movies.  

*-not intended to be serious.